The Importance of Self-Care
To all those in need of or even new to the “self-care game”- welcome. 2020 has been quite a year for all of us, and as we welcome the closing of 2020 (in less than thirty days) it’s important that we not only reflect on what we’ve endured individually and as a nation, but also acknowledge the importance of self-care moving forward into 2021. While this may not be the case for all, I personally, cannot wait for the new year. New opportunities, new possibilities, and a new outlook on life. Even though 2020 has been a rough year, I think we can all agree that we’ve learned the true meaning of gratitude and appreciation for the things we do have- regardless of how mundane and small they seemed before.
Thanksgiving came and went, and I for one, have a lot to be thankful for! While the future may hold much uncertainty, for the aspects and people in my life then continue to stay constant and reliable, I am forever grateful. This year, family has played a huge role in my self-care routine. Who said you had to implement self-care all alone? I’ve learned that being around family during this time is a form of self-care, for me. But what is self-care and why is it important?
According to the PsychCentral article “What Self Care Is- and What It Isn’t”, self care “is any activity that we do deliberately in order to take care of our mental, emotional, and physical health. Although it’s a simple concept in theory, it’s something we very often overlook. Good self-care is key to improved mood and reduced anxiety. It’s also key to a good relationship with oneself and others” (PsychCentral, What is self-care?). Another way to define self-care is by checking in with yourself. For example, asking yourself questions such as
How am I feeling right now?
What’s going on in my body, and why is it responding this way?
What are some changes that I’ve noticed in myself?
How am I handling everything that’s going on?
Asking yourself questions is a great way to initiate a conversation with yourself about self-care and what it means to you. Self-care looks different to and for everybody because we all may need or want different things, however, we all need self-care. Furthermore, the answers to the questions you ask yourself will ultimately inform you of what you're missing or overlooking within your body or mental well-being.
“When asked the question: “Do you take care of yourself?” most of us will answer “yes” — we’d even think, “What kind of question is this? Of course, I care about myself.”
When asked, “In what ways do you take care of yourself?” — well, that’s where the tricky part begins (PsychCentral, What is self-care?)”. Also, keep in mind, that self-care doesn’t always go hand in hand with self-indulgence. As a young woman who likes to pamper herself, I’ve learned that getting a frequent mani-pedi or going shopping may clear my head short-term but doesn’t serve as a solution to the inner or emotional turmoil or stress I may be feeling due to various factors. Inner work has nothing to do with how you look on the outside. In addition, self care is not something that we force ourselves to do, or something we don’t enjoy doing. Self-care is “something that refuels us, rather than takes from us.” And for those of us, who are “givers” or have a hard time saying “No”, self-care isn’t a selfish act either! It is not only about considering our needs; it is rather about knowing what we need to do in order to take care of ourselves...That is, if I don’t take enough care of myself, I won’t be in the place to give to my loved ones either” (PsychCentral, What isn’t self-care?). Sometimes, even saying “No” or expressing your inability to do something, is a prime example of self-care! It is okay to be there for yourself, rather than someone else- self-care says so!
Also, keep in mind that self-care is a choice and an aspect of your life that you have to be proactive about. If you don’t make time for yourself, no one else will. It’s up to you to carve out and find time in your day to cater to yourself because you deserve it. Everyday, you must actively choose yourself and find a balance of getting things done, while also ensuring that “your glass” stays full (or better yet- overflowed!) with all the things you need from yourself to live a happy and fulfilled life. Whether that’s carving out time to exercise for at least 30 minutes, eating three GOOD meals a day, reading a few chapters from that book you’ve been meaning to get to or even taking a hot bath after a long day to regroup- the choices are endless, but it’s up to you to choose you!
For those of you who may need a push in the right direction and some lovely inspiration, I encourage you to watch Tabitha Brown’s video on Self-Care - Tabitha Brown featured on her all new show “All Love”. Tabitha Brown is a social media personality, mother of two, and actress who has taken the world by storm with her delightful personality. If you ever need a laugh or a “pick-me-up”, check out Tabitha Brown!
Enjoy the video and feel free to leave answers to the reflection questions below!
How do you take care of yourself?
How was your self-care routine changed, if at all, since COVID?
How do you continue to make yourself a priority everyday and if you’re struggling to do so, what extra support is needed?
What is one thing you love about yourself?
What is one thing you’d like to start doing again and why?